Once my professor had requested the class to get a pen and a piece of paper and write down all the qualities of a person we like to settle down with in the future.
The qualities written by girls were about emotional satisfaction like loving, understanding, loyal and other things.
Most guys on the other hand want to have physical mates that are sexy (36 25 36), nice hair, complete teeth, nice complexion and other things.
If you base your search for mate on physical appearance - the relationship will not last. If a person has a wrong motive for choosing someone, the relationship will also not end well.
In Choosing a mate BEWARE
Of the friend who tells a series of hard-luck stories.
Of the friend who has a habit of making excuses and apologies.
Of the friend who has a habit of blaming others.
Of the fiend who tells white lies.
Of the friend who keeps the extra change given by mistake.
Of the friend who makes promises too easily.
Of the friend who borrows too often.
Of the friend who has debts.
Of the friend who is ill at ease in company.
Of the friend who is careless in personal neatness.
Of the friend who condones evil practices.
Of the friend who tells off-colour stories.
Of the friend who talks about sex.
Of the friend who is personally acquainted with persons who have questionable records.
Of the friend who doesn’t want to become acquainted with your family.
Of the friend who does not get along well with his parents.
Of the friend who ridicules church standards.
Of the friend who does not participate in religious activities.
Of the friend who uses profanity when his “tongue slips”.
Of the friend who admits that his past record is questionable but hastens to say, “I have turned around”.
(Adapted from: You and your Health vol 1. p. 210 Shryock H. et al, 1970,1978)
If you are not a believer you probably need to ignore #s: 17 &18.
Open your eyes and ears when you choose a mate. Most people show good qualities and just suppress their bad characters until you marry that person then surprise! Things change. So be careful.
Do not try to find a perfect partner because there no one is perfect. Find someone that values what you value most in life. Someone whose imperfection you can take. Someone willing to give back the love and respect you give.
Do you know the song by Karen Carpenter I know I need to be in Love? In her song she said, “I know I ask perfection for a quite imperfect world and fool enough to think that’s what I’ll find.”
Do not look for the perfect partner, if you do---you will get old waiting (hahaha).